My Response to those Forgotten

Hello again,

It seems we've been seeing a lot of each other, this blog and me. Anyway, I can't say either way if this reaction is unique to me, or if all of the hopeful exchangers feel it. That rush of sadness and nostalgia for an experience we have yet to live. I feel it in the pit of my stomach when I follow a link from the AFS study abroad blog list and I end up in a long forgotten, dusty memoir of an exchange long ended. I fear that in a blink of an eye, I too will be past all of the things I long for in this moment. How does it feel to live a dream? Is it magical? Does the ending leave you wanting more than you did before?

The way those blogs remind me of the passage of time, and my immediate instinct to exit it as quickly as possible for fear it might suck me into the past with a girl living her last week in Switzerland or a boy who never posted again after receiving his visa for Spain, it leaves me sad. It leaves me unbearably broken. Because they don't share the excitement I live in any longer. They have moved on. Each and every time it surprises me again. That someone could have been where I am in this second, and three years later not appreciate it. They are like abandoned buildings, empty train stations, crumpled love letters floating down the gutter. Their time is gone.

And then I find one that is still updated, where the returnee takes time to answer the hopefuls' questions. It gives me hope. Maybe I too can hold onto my passion and use it to support others in their journey, when the time comes. Just please, never let there be a day when I have lost my eagerness. Just some quick thoughts. Let me know your reaction when you stumble across a forgotten blog.

Best,
Savannah
(This was typed well before my previous post. Just found it buried in the graveyard of my drafts and thought to resurrect it.)